Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize
