So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
