Pappa wants mamma naked
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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