Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize