I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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