Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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