I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Randomize