she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize
