i barfeds in our rink
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
