Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
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