if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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