I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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