I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
they need to just BURY HIM!
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Randomize
