i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
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