Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
Randomize
