I feel like I'm in dance class right now
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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