There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
tell me about the eggs
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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