I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
