I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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