At least make sure they are 18
Why
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize
