that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
What a dumb baby whore.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
