I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
