the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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