You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
