it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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