Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
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