You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Church boner. Awkwardddd
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Randomize
