I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I'm eating all of the evidence.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
