38 yer olds are good kisserssss
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
