16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize
