just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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