We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
