he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
everyone is single if you try hard enough
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Randomize
