Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
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