If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Randomize
