I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
Randomize