We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Randomize