She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
