i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
