I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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