ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize