oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
