I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize