His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
