Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
