Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
