well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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