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• (517): View more from Michigan

  and trust me i need no booty pop lessons

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• (559): View more from California

  my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (773): View more from Illinois

  I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.

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• (253): View more from Washington

  My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option

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• (307): View more from Wyoming

  While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..

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