just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
