The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
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