You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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