Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I'm getting married
To pizza
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
